Wednesday, December 22, 2010

This Christmas is shaken. The carols don't reach me, decorations don't excite me, there is no happy nostalgia to be mine.
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If you've been a reader for a while, you can guess that this is because my dad died in May, and this is the first stretch of holidays without him. It defines difficult.
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That said, I'm trying. We're going through the motions, and I've baked, bought, wrapped, decorated, sung, sat at the school program and helped with the church one. I'm trying to shake up the happiness.
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This is the only song that fills me for Christmas. It reminds me there is a Spirit to behold, and love to spread.
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Wishing you the best of blessings.
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Love,
Janna

15 comments:

Melissa Gill said...

Yeah, that stinks about your dad. I don't think there's any way except to just force your way through it. Good luck with that, and I'll keep you in my prayers.

The Happy Whisk said...

I'm sorry for your dad passing and wanted to drop in with healing wishes.

The Happy Whisk said...

And thanks for stopping by mine. It's hard what you're going through. Keeping you in my thoughts and sending lots of healing wishes.

Jill Kemerer said...

I have no good words to make it better. I've had Christmases where I didn't have much spirit either, but I made the effort and am glad I did.

Praying for you and hoping you'll catch a glimmer of peace and joy this Christmas.

Melanie Hooyenga said...

Janna, I hope you're able to get through. My grampa died on Christmas when I was in college and it took probably ten years for the holiday to feel "normal".

::hugs::

Slamdunk said...

My prayers are with you Janna. It has been many years since my mom passed away and I can't see a Christmas tree without thinking how things used to be.

DL Hammons said...

We don't know each other very well, so I know my words will sound empty to you, but this Christmas I will be thinking about you and those like you who've had their worlds turned upside down by the loss of a loved one. I lost my mother a month before Christmas several years ago and I still remember going through that time just feeling numb. The hurt does recede (but never goes away) and I am now celebrating Christmas as heartily as I ever have. Like your video (which I ABSOLUTELY LOVE btw) suggests, we shook our traditions up and incorporated a few new ones in my mothers memory.

MERRY CHRISTMAS Janna. :)

Patti Lacy said...

Oh, Janna. My heart aches for you.
May God give you a peace that will soothe and salve.

Whispered a prayer for you.
Patti

Melissa Sarno said...

I'm sorry you're having a tough holiday season. I've never heard this song but it's really fun :-) I thought of you and your blog a few weeks ago when I saw a woman selling tee-shirts at a market that had pictures of old typewriters on them! I hope I can find her again and let you know the name of her shop :-)

AvDB said...

My deepest condolences on your father's passing. It must be difficult to maintain the happy face that is requisite when one has children. Take care of yourself.

Capri K said...

We will soldier on together during this year of firsts.
Merry Christmas Janna. Much peace, love and JOY to you and your family.

Diane said...

Thinking of you friend. Hugs.

ralfast said...

I kinda feel the same. I'm trying to get the Xmas spirit but alas....

Happy Holidays to all just the same.

Kelly H-Y said...

Oh, that is so very hard ... I'm sorry to hear that, and wish you as much happiness as possible this Christmas. This will be my first Christmas ever without my Grandpa, who passed away in October ... it just feels like something is missing.

June Kramin said...

((Hugs)) Janna! Thanks for the song. Sorry for your void this year. May you laugh over happy memories & eggnog! Love you, girl!