Monday, September 21, 2009

Can't Explain

I went to the library, all by myself. My intention to look for a particular title was waylaid. There were no instigations, no distractions from other people, no. What kept me from my plan, for only moments, was something not just anyone noticed. Not the way I noticed.

I stood, still and in awe, eyes and heart engaged.

New releases. They were lined just so, how do you call it? Staggered. So you could peep a view of each cover, get that first impression. Each stood, bold and proud. They announced arrival, but moreso attainment of a writer's destination.

I wanted to turn to other patrons and shout, "Do you see these? Do you understand how beautiful, how important they are? Do you know what these represent?"

And when the head librarian passed by, asking if she could help with anything, I wanted to cry, "This is my goal, do you know? Do you feel it! One day you and I will stand here together, and my book will occupy this spot we see."

I felt it. It was powerful, for only moments.

I just can't explain.

41 comments:

Capri K @ No Whining Allowed said...

Hope you reach your goal soon!
Then, what will your next goal be?

JKB said...

I had the same thing happen.

We'll make it, buddy.

*hug*

Sherrinda Ketchersid said...

I was at my library Saturday and had a similar experience! As I perused the New Releases, I envisioned mine being there! lol Someday.... :)

p.s. Then I came home with WAAYYYY too many books to read!!!!

Anonymous said...

You'll have one sitting on the shelf soon. I know it!

I picked one up the other day when I brought my kids to the library...just couldn't resist. It was the 'Wildwater Walking Club' - a chick flick in print.
-FringeGirl

Donna M. Kohlstrom said...

Some day I hope all of us writer blogger family will be able to stand in front of the new releases and say, "There's my book, Jody's book, Terri's book, Donna's book, just to name a few!" What a party we'd have!

Terri Tiffany said...

Yes-- I agree with Donna-- we are going to see our books on a shelf someday and understand all the sweat and pain and effort that went into it:)

Rebecca Nazar said...

I get that feeling when I enter Barnes and Noble and see those cardboard display stands full of a writer's serial work in paperback.

Lori said...

Wow. It is powerful when you write about it too. The dream come true.

Joanne said...

Don't you love the way being a writer opens your eyes to the "everyday" sights in such an insightful way? Great inspiration, Janna!

Janna Leadbetter said...

Capri K - To writer more, better!

JKB - *fist bump*

sherrinda - The library is such a magical place.

FG - I'll have to see if I can find that one.

Donna - I like that idea.

Terri - We'll get our reward!

Becca - I need a fieldtrip to B&N.

Lori - I just love that feeling. It's so deep and strong in me, you know?

Joanne, thanks! Are you back from your hiatus? Happy Fall. :)

Melanie Hooyenga said...

Aww, that's great you had that connection with the newly published authors. My goal too!

WV: readogro -- if you transpose the g & r you get read or go. :)

Tess said...

This is what I love most about my blogging friends.

They get it. They really, really do.

Kristen Torres-Toro said...

I avoid the library at all costs because I owe them money. I think a few years ago I had my first late fee... like a dollar. Now I refuse to go in just in case they catch me. :0)

I can't wait for that day either!

Wendy Paine Miller said...

I feel it. I get it. Here's to someday!
~ Wendy

Diane said...

Awesome breakthrough! You could see it coming and soon you physically will! :O)

Melissa Amateis said...

AMEN.

Anonymous said...

So your goal is immortality.

Janna Leadbetter said...

Melanie, that's an awesome! A really cool blog title idea, you know?

Tess - Absolutely. My husband and I had the talk (again) this weekend about how only other writers truly understand that part of me.

Kristen - Shame on you. ;)

Wendy - Yes!

Diane - I dream it with every fiber.

Melissa - Good reminder to pray. *hugs*

Rafael - I guess it is in a way, isn't it? Cool

Susan R. Mills said...

I know the feeling. I get it every time I'm in a book store. All I can say is, it will happen!

Regina Quentin said...

That's a great feeling. It is something you do want to shout out and get other people to share with you. It's sad that only a small percentage of the population would understand though.

JLC said...

That is awesome! It's inspirational moments like yous that keeps us on track. I am looking forward to buying your book!! :D

Jessica Nelson said...

I really know what you felt!
It's awesome. Before I started writing I had no clue what "debut author" stood for. Or "new release". Now I do though, and it really is precious proof of persistence. (lol, sorry about all the p's, *snort*)

Janna Leadbetter said...

Lazy Writer - We have to believe.

Regina, welcome! I guess I don't mind the small number so much, because it makes finding another who understands that much sweeter. You know?

JLC - That makes me feel really good. Thanks. :)

Jessica - I love your P's AND your snorts. ;)

Jody Hedlund said...

Oh, Janna! Beautifully put! At our conference this past weekend, the keynote speaker told us to write down our five top goals for our writing future. She said to dream big, because subconciously our minds will follow what's in our hearts.

Jill Kemerer said...

I know! I can't tell you how many times I've gone to a huge bookstore and found the exact spot on the shelf where my book will someday sit. It's beautiful. Writing is important. I can't wait until I can pick up one of your books!

Janna Leadbetter said...

Jody - Thanks! And top five? I think that's a great idea. I'll give mine some thought.

Jill - Ooh, I'll have to do that. And thanks!

Susan J. Reinhardt said...

Hi Janna -

What an awesome experience! Keep that in your heart as you write.

Thanks for inspiring me today. :)

Blessings,
Susan

Deb said...

Nice image!

Janna Leadbetter said...

Susan - I'd very much love to (keep it in my heart). Great idea!

Strange Fiction - Thank ya!

Diane Marie Shaw said...

Us writers get it. It is so good to know there is a community so ready to support each other. The rest of the world may think we are full of ourselves but we know we are full of "words" and that someday they will be reading our words.
Diane

Deb Shucka said...

You don't need to explain. I'm standing there with you, feeling the exact same thing. I do this in book stores, too. We will be there. We will.

Janna Leadbetter said...

Diane - I've never been so pleased to be full of something. ;)

Deb - I knew you'd understand.

Glynis Peters said...

Oh I know how you feel. I did the same in a bookstore in the UK. I called DH over to a shelf and whispered, oneday I hope it will be my turn. It was quite an emotional moment for me. When I returned to Cyprus I knew I was going to be more positive about my writing, just because of that moment.
I do hope you get your 'one day' soon.

Kathy said...

Yup, I know how you feel.

I remember being at Waldenbooks one time. I was looking at the young adult novels, picturing my novel in one of the spots. I think I did mention to one of the clerks that I was writing one. She said, "Great! Come back when you're published and we'll have a book signing."

Oh, it only it were that easy.

Janna Leadbetter said...

Glynis - It is good for that, isn't it? Sort of kicks the motivation into overdrive.

Kathy - I remember Waldenbooks! I don't think they're still open here. Did all of them go out of business? And yes, from the clerk's mouth to publishers' ears? ;)

Woman in a Window said...

You don't have to explain it. I felt it once, twenty years ago, and I've not forgotten. Gotten sidetracked, yes, but not forgotten.

Janna Leadbetter said...

Woman - (I see a picture! Hi!) It's not too late.

colbymarshall said...

One day we'll be there, too :-)

Kathryn Magendie said...

Oh! The day I went into the Haywood County Library and went to the fiction section and then to "regional" or "Local" and saw Tender Graces, well, I about cried.....

I want this for you, too

Janna Leadbetter said...

Colby - I think positive thoughts for you! I hope your agented journey has begun well.

Kat - Thank you, lady. I'd be proud to find ranks among writers like you.

Nadine said...

I feel the same way every time I go into a book store. I love the promise and the energy there!